Since I’ve been writing about veganism, I notice that the two major arguments that people make the most are that veganism is best from the point of view of animal cruelty (which to me is indisputable, despite the fact that many will make vegans out to be bleeding hearts for having empathy), and that veganism…
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Veganism Again
Yesterday, I decided to give myself a day off to do whatever I wanted. Except spend money, of course, since I don’t exactly have any. This is a problem because transportation is more expensive when you don’t have a car, so I found myself in my room watching YouTube videos all day. At first I…
Continue Reading“Are you OK? Do you need anything?”
I recently mentioned to my therapist that I do most of my schoolwork at night when staff is less likely to come and knock on my door asking if I’m okay. She asked what it meant to me when people ask if I need help. To me, in a best case scenario the other person…
Continue ReadingI got my first tattoo and I am SO EXCITED
I probably would never have gotten a tattoo but I have scarring on my right wrist and all over my left forearm as a leftover reminder of my troubled youth, and my aunt and uncle volunteered to help me remedy that. It turns out that getting a tattoo is (at least from what I could…
Continue ReadingBetter Today
One time, Dr. X told me that if you’re in a crisis but you push through, things get better. Actually I suspect that I’ve had this conversation more than once with more than one person and probably more than once with just Dr. X. But the one conversation stood out and since yesterday was sort…
Continue ReadingWhy can’t anyone love me?
I just feel so deeply alone. I’ve been initiating contact with my siblings but they never ever respond. The only time I actually get to communicate with them is on Christmas if I get them gifts, so I maxed out my credit card (which had a low limit, fortunately) on Christmas presents for them. Then…
Continue ReadingGetting Back in the Swing of Things
Just another life update. It turns out that missing ten days of school due to an emotional meltdown puts you way behind on life obligations, so I’ve been going crazy trying to catch up. I finally turned in my last past-due assignment yesterday and now I’m trying to finish this week’s projects by the end…
Continue ReadingPhoning Home
Today was the two staff members at day treatment’s last day. I was expecting it to be hard, but it was harder than I was really ready for. I’ve been in my room since I got back and every time I hear footsteps I silently panic that somebody is going to knock on my door…
Continue ReadingJournals from the Hospital
I discharged from the hospital today. I feel a lot better. When I was going through my long inpatient stay, “David” the staff member and I used to talk about The Two Percent. The Two Percent sucks. She and I have virtually nothing in common, and yet she hijacks my body and does and says…
Continue ReadingThird Time’s a Charm
I finally just begged the crisis team worker to admit me since it was my third time in the ER in two days. I told him I knew I would probably be looking at spending a week in a really unpleasant ER setting but I just couldn’t manage on my own. Thankfully, he agreed. I’ve…
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