I took a shower today. Historically, taking a shower has meant sweating profusely and hyperventilating for at least half an hour after getting out, but lately my body has decided to add in uncontrollable vomiting. My therapist strongly advised me to shower 1-2 times a week rather than daily since it seems like my body…

So, this group home really is not working out. The only two things that make it bearable are that there isn’t a roach infestation, and the rent is subsidized (although being required to pay 75% of my income feels steep) so I don’t have to worry about homelessness. But the other members of the group…

It’s almost 1am. I had been going to bed by 9pm and getting up at 5am, but last night and tonight my body has decided to rebel. Well, maybe not my body as much as my mind. It is very busy feeling sad right now, so it says we can’t go to sleep. I was…

I haven’t been on this blog as much lately because now that I’m out of the hospital and have my laptop back, I’ve been working on my book. Book-writing turns out to be really hard. It’s not that I don’t have enough to say, but when I’m writing about traumatic events in my life, it’s…

As I mentioned in my previous entry, as of June 1 I have been discharged from the psych hospital and am now in a group home. This has given me more freedom but much, much crazier roommates and reduced support from staff. I also don’t have a car or money for rideshares so I’ve been…

It’s been exactly four weeks since I was discharged and I haven’t updated this blog since! I’ve kind of been operating under the assumption that nobody was reading it anymore since I can no longer just shamelessly advertise it to any staff who will listen. It was kind of a sad day and I missed…

I stumbled across this for the first time years ago, and I think of it often. I think of things I said, and even genuinely believed. It was my extreme fortune that nobody ever made fun of me for it, even outside the “Christian bubble.” They just thought it was an interesting perspective that I…

Christian apostates obviously are an extremely varied group of people, but one thing we can pretty much all agree on is that certain arguments that Christians use constantly are very ineffective. For example, it’s incredibly invalidating when people use the “you were never really saved” argument. I’ve touched on that a few times now, such…

I keep my blog subscriptions separate from my personal subscriptions, which are mostly about kittens and other cute animals. I wish I had time to actually watch all these people’s content!

I’m officially discharging on Wednesday, June 1. I’m not doing as great with it as I was because Dr. X is on vacation this week and I wanted him to be able to see me off. I suspect that things will be better once I’m actually out, but right now I’m kind of in limbo….