Someone posted this on the Evangelical Reddit page today https://reddit.com/r/Exvangelical/s/OlmdIFhhbb TL;DR: The OP’s mom is Evangelical and heard an “uplifting” story about a guy whose mom didn’t abort him. I replied with this: A very kind staff member just did a check-in to see if I was depressed at all. I said yeah, technically, I…
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Id Ego and Superego when you have C-PTSD
I’ve been meaning to bring this up with a therapist or something for several years, and I don’t remember having gotten to it. Ever since I can remember, my internal narrative rarely uses the first person singular. It usually says “you” or “we” instead. When I first went off to college, the voice that said…
Continue ReadingA Parasite to Society
So, on Tuesday night, I sent the PHP one of my famous emails: Hi. My day was good. After program, I got a call from the receptionist at my therapist’s office that my therapist never wanted to see me again. Therapist had never given me any indication whatsoever that there was any kind of problem,…
Continue ReadingThis Could be the End
Well. Back when I had my long inpatient stay with Dr X, one of my initial concerns was that I didn’t want to get attached to anyone, ever, because the other person always left. Usually, they do so when I’m at my absolute worst, because they decide that they’re not being helpful enough. One day…
Continue ReadingMet with doctor and social worker today
Still inpatient. It’s been a bit rocky. I thought I had someone to clean my turtle’s tank and then the person forgot that she had said she’d do it, so I had to find a last minute pet sitter who could go in and do it today. However, this meant that I couldn’t spend the…
Continue ReadingI don’t want to be the person I am today
About a year ago, someone shared a video in a Facebook support group I’m in that was so good that I went back to find it. And I did find it: Tragically, when I clicked the link, I got the dreaded: In good news, your girl the Apostate Turtle memorized the transcription. The delivery won’t…
Continue ReadingWhen the words that I’m saying and the words that they’re hearing basically don’t overlap at all
So. There was an episode at work and I don’t want to go back and look at how much I’ve written about it on here. Suffice it to say, I’m trying to define “flashback.” So I found this video: This was my reply: Thank you for this! I have a diagnosis of PTSD (technically severe…
Continue ReadingI am so confused.
So, we’re supposed to do “weekly updates” for the college class that I’m in that I’ve had a grade of Incomplete in since eternity ago. I emailed my professor and tried to keep it “professional” as usual, which in my life means being as vague as is emotionally possible. So this was me: Well. It…
Continue ReadingThankfully, We Have Civil Rights Now
I’m trying to avoid making all my blog entries be variants of “It’s going well” or “It’s going badly.” So instead, I’m going to attach a copy of the complaint form that I just mailed in to DMH. So. Here is what happened. First, it was September 11, so every millennial in the country was…
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