Author: theapostateturtle

When I was a kid, I remember my mom swinging around my baby sibling. Sibling was an infant and had gone to sleep, and Mom thought it was hilarious that nothing would wake them up. Looking back, I recognize that this is normal for babies, and it was also developmentally normal that I couldn’t sleep…

Well, I thought I should try to tie together everything from the past couple of weeks. I feel like it’s been nonstop, but looking back, it definitely has indeed been nonstop. Which would explain why I’m exhausted. Anyway, I’ve been making videos with an mp3 to mp4 converter that I found here: https://converter.app/mp3-to-video So this…

I wrote this to a mentor recently: Dr X once said there were four ways to address a problem. I forgot all of them but Google had my back: https://counselingcentergroup.com/dbt-4-ways-to-solve-a-problem TL;DR: So, I feel like we have options. One, we can be miserable. Two, we can just acknowledge that political unrest is a global reality….

I’m revisiting an old topic here, because I’m frustrated over not having a car, and I need to remember why I got rid of my old one. It can be a pain taking the bus, but I chose this for a reason. Difficulty concentrating was a big part, but it’s also a social movement. I…

So, as those closest to me know, being a mom has been the most important goal that I’ve had for my life, for my whole life, except during times when things were so low that I had no goals. Once Dr X did his intervention and I was able to think about the future again,…

Well, things are not going very well with my outpatient psychiatrist. He’s hinted at throwing be back into VNA services a few times over the past couple months (“Do you feel comfortable managing your own medications at home?”), so I don’t feel like I can safely be fully honest if anything goes wrong. I described…

Well, I’m hanging in. The hospital increased my dose of an antipsychotic, which has helped a lot with voices and somatic flashbacks. In an ideal world, I would have been able to take a couple weeks and do a partial program but unfortunately, I have to make money. So I’m substitute teaching again. Then, this…

It’s been tough. When I was still in communication with my mother (so, birth through my mid 20s), everybody’s perspective mattered except mine. Any time I told Mom about anything difficult that was happening, she immediately wanted to “see it from the other person’s perspective.” Even if I wasn’t angry at the person. Even if…

Warning: There are a lot of typos in this. Ordinary, I would edit them out. But this is not ordinarily. Well, it’s time for a proper update. Things aren’t actually going all that well. Previously, everything was awful except work. Work started going south, and here we are. Background The really major problems started with…