Author: theapostateturtle

One of the hospital’s chaplains came by to see me today. For some reason, they think I’m the bee’s knees. It made me feel really good. Although I’m not religious now, I was for most of my life up to this point, and I feel like the chaplains here can relate to me in a…

I’m considering going through this blog and taking out some of the more intense content, just in case I actually am discovered one day. For now, it’s been a rocky week. I keep making really bad decisions and I’m confused about how much “blame” I need to take for them. On the one hand, chalking…

Writing by hand exposes my weaknesses. There are definitely both spelling errors and grammatical in here. Hopefully 100 years from now when they dig up my blog and someone reads it, they will appreciate my being vulnerable!

I’ve been writing a lot lately, and I’m sure that at this point, I’m going through a redundant stage on my blog. The key to processing seems to be that you’re annoyingly redundant for a while, but it is absolutely essential to move past that stage eventually. Maybe blogging will help push me over the…

It’s been a while. I have to admit, I got a bit discouraged when I’d been blogging for a couple of months and still hadn’t gotten any comments. But really, I’m mostly doing this for myself and no one else. Any readers who ever happen upon this site will just be a bonus. I notice…

[Note from the future: The embedded link seems to not be working, but the URL at the bottom of the page is active.] I told my team today about all the things I want to do with my life, and I was surprised how positive they were about it. There was no mention of “Well,…

I’ve got 20 minutes left in the computer room, but I wanted to put this on here. Thinking about the short-term and short-term goals seems to be a much more popular lens than focusing on the long-term, but I think that’s exactly what brought me to rock bottom. The short term is going to suck,…

I haven’t been writing as much lately, for a reason. The 🤬 hospital changed their policies again and this time they reduced our screentime. It’s hard for me to fit everything I do on the phone into a brief period of time, so I don’t get to write as much as I would like. What’s…

”But Daddy I didn’t try to!” I remember my tiny voice crying desperately. ”Well you didn’t try not to!” my father roared, before diving in to pour out his wrath on me. Or sometimes, ”But Daddy I forgot that I wasn’t allowed to do that!” I screamed in total sincerity. “Well this will help you…